How Do I Get Him Back
The Relationship Doctor
Bob Grant,
Licensed Professional Counselor
"How to Get Your Man Back
-- and Keep Him Devoted to You For Good"
by Bob Grant, L.P.C. -
"The Relationship Doctor"
Ladies, has this ever happened to you, or
to another woman you know? ↓
You
meet a great guy. You start dating and your relationship goes
well over the first few weeks or months. You're convinced he's
definitely into you -- maybe even in love with you. Suddenly,
just when you start thinking he's Mr. Right, he loses interest
in you and begins to pull away.
You
panic -- and you start asking yourself, "What
happened?"
Then comes the inevitable question ...
"Where
did I go wrong?"
You spend all your time replaying in your mind over and over what
happened during your last conversation or encounter with him,
looking for clues as to what might have led to your breakup. What
should you have done or said -- and what should you not
have done or said? You say to yourself, "If only I could
understand why he left me, I could fix it."
Then,
when you can't find anything you did wrong, you begin to wonder,
'What's wrong with him?'
Maybe he's got a drug problem, maybe he met someone else,
maybe he's got intimacy issues, maybe he's gay, and so on ...
ad nauseum.
Sound familiar?
Then, you do what most women do ... consult with your girlfriends
(or your sister, cousin or Mom) and together, you speculate for
hours why he suddenly seems indifferent and distant. You
devise all kinds of ploys to put yourself in his path or to
get him to call you -- but nothing works.
Then, you're faced with the agonizing decision ... do you
go on hopelessly wishing he'll come back to you, while feeling
hurt and broken-hearted -- or just forget about him and chalk
him up as "the man who got away?"
If you're experiencing the above
scenario...
.....or you know someone who is going through it
..... or you just want to prevent it from happening to
you
-- this may be the most important article you'll ever read!
When a man leaves a relationship, and the woman wonders where she went
wrong, and tries desperately to get him back, that's actually a common
pattern I've seen
all too often in man-woman relationships. It certainly causes a lot of
distress in women -- but the good news is that there's an easy
solution to this problem!
In the next 5 minutes, as
you read this article in its entirety, you'll discover ...
the reasons why a man suddenly loses interest in
having a relationship with you, even if he was previously very much
into you
how your natural tendencies
as a woman often contribute to the breakup -- and what you can
do to avoid sabotaging your reconciliation efforts;
the No.1
mistake women make when trying to get their man back;
and
my step-by-step game plan --
including techniques that have been used for centuries to rekindle
relationships. This irresistible game plan is virtually
guaranteed to soften your ex-boyfriend's (or ex-husband's) heart
and create a deeper bond between the two of you that paves the
way to re-establishing your relationship.
I'll even reveal to you my word-for-word script
-- 9 incredibly powerful
words you can say to your man that will make him realize he
simply couldn't bear to lose you!
I urge you to adopt my game plan as soon as possible. Don't wait until
your man has moved on in his life without you and shut you out of his
heart forever. You must strike while the iron's hot. When you
follow my game plan exactly as prescribed, it is highly likely
that he'll come running back to you.
A Man's Change of
Heart
A client (whom I will call Charlene
to protect her privacy) came to consult with me last year. She
had been dating a man named Martin for 6 months. Charlene was 43
and had 4 children. The relationship was going beautifully for a
few months when, out of the blue, Martin told her that he wasn't
ready to get married -- so he stopped seeing her.
She felt devastated, and when she came to my office for counseling,
she broke into tears often as she told me her story.
I showed her my proven game plan for getting Martin back --
and she began to implement it. At first, nothing happened and she
thought the plan wasn't working -- but she stuck to the plan
anyway. Seven months later, Martin proposed to her -- and 3
months thereafter, they were married.
If you were to ask Martin what caused his change of heart, he
would never be able to tell. But Charlene and I know that "the
plan" had everything to do with it!
Why They Call Me the "Relationship
Doctor"
My
name is Bob Grant. I'm a Licensed Professional Counselor, therapist,
and relationship coach with 16 years of successful practice. I'm
also the author of the popular book,
The Woman Men Adore ... And Never Want to Leave
(2005).
People call me "The Relationship Doctor" because I have the
prescription for
finding love, keeping passion alive, and reigniting relationships that
have lost their spark.
The majority of my clients are women -- and one of the top
relationship problems they've brought to my attention is this:
The man in their life has
lost interest in them and they want to know how to get him back.
Luckily, I have an effective remedy based not only on real-life feedback
from hundreds of my real-life female clients, but also from
time-tested strategies and techniques I've developed over
the years which, when properly implemented, are most
difficult for a man to resist!
But before I reveal the "remedy" -- or the absolute best game plan to
bring back your man -- I'm going to ask you to take part in the fun and
eye-opening 7-second pop quiz below.
If
a man with whom you've recently had a good relationship
suddenly loses interest in you -- and you sense that he's
beginning to pull away from you -- which of the following
frequently used
strategies do you think is the best thing you
can do to get him back? ↓ Check
one.
A.
Write him
a letter (expressing your
heartfelt emotions, reminding him of all the good times
you've had together, what you think went wrong in your
relationship, ways to make your relationship better, etc.)
B.
Call
him on the phone, tell him how you feel -- and get him to
open up and talk about his feelings
C.
Give him gifts and shower him with sweetness and love
-- so he'll realize what he's missing by not having you in his
life
D.
Call him and say, "No one will ever love
you as much as I do."
Have you placed a check mark next
to your answer? If so, which of the above strategies did you check --
A, B, C or D?
If you checked any one of them, then I'm afraid that your answer
...
... is wrong.
The correct answer is none of them!
That's right -- none of the above strategies work, at least not
permanently.
The No.
1
Mistake Women Make When Trying to Get Their Man Back
In the 16 years I've spent in
relationship coaching, I've found that most women do not have
a clue as to how to effectively win back a man who has lost interest in
them. They almost always go about it the wrong way!
By far, the most common mistake a woman makes when trying to get a man
back is this:
She uses strategies that work on women but not on men.
Let me explain.
Men
respond to things differently than women -- and
they're not hardwired
to understand feelings the way women are. That's why talking
about your feelings -- and getting him to talk about his
feelings -- rarely works.
Writing him a letter is also a waste of time because words do
not have the same effect on a man that they have on a woman -- no
matter how wonderful your words are and how beautiful the
sentiments behind those words.
Most women think that words are going to tug at a man's heart strings,
and make him fall to his knees begging for the woman to take him back.
Ladies, let me be blunt: They don't.
Words are for women. While it might make you feel good that
you've written the most inspiring letter in the world, your letter won't
have much of an impact on a man. Period.
Giving him gifts and showering him with sweetness and love seldom work
either because men don't flow as well in the emotional realm as women
do. You simply cannot flood a man's heart with emotions to win him
back the way you can a woman's.
The Guy Didn't Know
What Hit Him!
Heather started dating a guy named
Greg, who she didn't know was dating 2 other women besides her.
One day, Greg told her up front about the other women -- and
Heather was shocked and dismayed because she had been
dating him exclusively and had thought the exclusivity was
mutual.
Not knowing what else to do, she gave him an ultimatum,
"You have to choose -- it's either them or me" -- to which he
replied that he wasn't ready to date her exclusively. He then
stopped seeing her altogether. This is an example of not knowing
how or when to give an ultimatum --
that's why it backfired on her.
I showed Heather the game plan and she immediately set it in
motion. For 4 weeks, nothing happened. Greg didn't even call her
-- and that made her think he probably just wanted to play the
field, and didn't want to be tied down to one woman.
On
the 5th week, he called and said, "I've been thinking about you."
He said he wanted to know how she was doing, and just wanted to
talk -- without particularly wanting to get back with her. Little
did Greg know that the game plan had prepared Heather for this
very call -- she knew EXACTLY what to say to Greg and how to
say it. Within a month of working the magic of "the plan,"
they went on a date. Soon thereafter, Greg stopped seeing the
other 2 women -- and decided to have a relationship with Heather
exclusively. Heather had captured his heart -- and he didn't know
what hit him!
Why Do Most Strategies for Getting a Man Back
Fail Miserably?
Because they fail to identify or address the root cause of why
your man left you or lost interest in the first place. So even if you
do manage to get your man back using one of the common ploys, it will be
temporary at best because the cause of your breakup would
remain unresolved.
What complicates the problem is that men are not usually willing to open
up about their feelings long enough for you to figure out what it was
that caused them to leave. And oftentimes they may not even be aware
of the underlying reason why they habitually try to escape from
relationships that are going well.
When women make "educated guesses" as to what caused their man to break
up with them, more often than not, they guess wrong -- and so
they waste all their time trying to fix the wrong thing -- and
never get anywhere.
So what's a woman to do?
I'll get to that in a moment. But first, here's what you should not
do. ↓
WARNING:
Beware of Untrained
Relationship Coaches and
Relationship Resources that Dispense Advice of
Dubious Value
There are several books -- not to mention dozens of
articles in women's magazines -- about how to get your man back or how
to rekindle an old romance. There are even more self-proclaimed
"relationship coaches" who claim they can help you with your
relationship problems. Whatever you do, don't fall for the following:
Relationship Books
that are not Gender-Specific
-- Books that give generic advice for both men and women
seeking to rekindle relationships with their ex-girlfriend or
ex-boyfriend are seldom effective because, as I've pointed out above,
what works on women does
not work on men -- and vice versa. Most available
resources tend to be tilted in favor of helping men get their woman
back.
Books, Magazine
Articles or Relationship Advice Based on Trickery and Artifice
-- Far too many books, magazine articles and relationship advisors show
you how to "trick" a man into submission by using all sorts of artifice
-- and of course, the old stand-by, sex. In my opinion, these do more
harm than good. Trickery could work in the short-term, and it
may help you get your man back temporarily, but it won't enable
you to sustain the
relationship -- you're likely to lose your man again down the
line because the device used to get him back was based on shallow
motivations instead of a deep understanding of men.
Advice Given by Untrained or
Inexperienced Relationship Coaches
-- There's been a recent proliferation of "relationship coaches" who,
after having completed a mere 12 to 48 hours of life coach training,
masquerade as relationship experts. When you take advice from such
untrained people who resort to guesswork instead of extensive
real-life experience, you run the risk of making critical mistakes that
could jeopardize your chances of ever getting your man back.
So now that you know what not to do, what should you do?
My private relationship counseling practice has enabled me to develop
powerful strategies for helping couples rekindle relationships --
including a step-by-step game plan to help women get their man back. I
truly want to share this game plan with more than just the clients who
are able to travel to my office in Georgia to sit down with me
face-to-face. I also want to help those who can't afford my counseling
services ($125/hour).
So I devised a way that will enable you to gain immediate access
to my game plan, and let you benefit from my experience without
you having to shell out hundreds of dollars in hourly fees -- and
without leaving the comfort of your own home or office.
For the first time, I've
spilled my secrets in the pages of my second E-book, titled
How Do I Get Him Back.
Unlike other relationship resources that teach you the obvious
ploys for rekindling a man's interest temporarily (through the
promise of sex or other enticements), my E-book shows you how
to understand your man deeply so that you can sustain your relationship
after he does come back to you.
Here's a sneak peek at some of the nuggets contained in the E-book:
How
to tap into a man's pain, which holds the secret to
reaching his heart
(see page 13)
The
9 words you can say to your man that will make him realize
he simply can't bear to lose you -- this last-ditch tactic is
based on one of the most powerful psychological motivators
in the world!
(see page 68)
When
do your acts of kindness, empathy, generosity, graciousness and
taking pain away come across to a man as being controlling
-- instead of being perceived as praiseworthy intentions?
(see pages 10-11)
How
to get what you really want in a man -- a simple exercise
that takes all the guesswork out
of determining if the man you want back is good for you --
or worth all the trouble to get him back
(see pages 45-50)
How
to use your feminine attributes to make yourself a "safe" person
in whom he can confide his fears and inner pain so
that you can finally discover the real reason he escapes from
relationships -- and ultimately, make him want to get back
with you; (see
page 86)
Why
a man's imagination is the best thing you have going
for you -- and how to use it to make him crave to be with
you again. (see
pages 60-61)
How
to identify signals in a man's voice that tell you his
guard is down, he's willing to let you get closer to him, and it's
the best time to talk about the previous issues in your
relationship
(see page 64)
What
if he doesn't call you? How to initiate contact with a man in a
demure and classy way -- without appearing
too forward or desperate, or running the risk of being regarded a
stalker.
(see page 66-69)
How
to affect a man on an emotional level to maximize the
chances of rekindling your relationship with him
(see page 66)
What
you must do in order to get the attention of your ex -- and how to
determine what will cause him to want to be with you again.
(see page 44)
How
to show a man you care about him without coming across as being
too needy, or emotionally "high-maintenance" -- which could
backfire on you and cause your man to back off. Also, how to tell
when a man has reached the threshold of giving, and is
overwhelmed by your needs that he feels the need to escape.
(see page 31)
How
to know if your man has unresolved issues which persist
even when you're doing everything right in a relationship
-- and how to know if those issues can be resolved, of if you need
to give him up as a lost cause
(see pages 35-36)
WARNING:
Your acts
of kindness and generosity may be giving him the impression that
you're a woman with low self-esteem, or one who's trying too
hard to please him. How to know when you're giving too much
(see page 30)
The
top 3 reasons why a man chooses to end his relationship with a
woman -- the sooner you understand these reasons, the sooner
you can get him back, and prevent
the same mistakes from happening again
(see page 41)
How
to influence and shape your man's opinion of you -- and get
him to see you as being more beautiful and more valuable,
not someone who can be taken for granted
(see page 74-76)
The
Art of Perfect Timing -- How to create the perfect environment
and time to give your man relationship-enhancing advice or
insights at the precise moment he is ready to hear it -- so
as not to drive him further away
(see pages 21-22)
Why
insisting on a commitment from a man is one of the best
things you can do for him -- whether he thinks it's a good
idea or not (see page 28)
How
to differentiate between the insight problems and
motivation problems involved in your breakup, and how to deal
with each type correctly
(see pages 20-22)
How
to avoid putting your man on the defensive with your well-meaning
opinions (see
page 20)
How
to understand what's really going on inside a man's heart
in order to make him warm up to the idea of reconciling with you
-- this is something he might not even be aware of, or he
