DON'T Call Any Funeral Homes!! | buryorburn.com
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FOR THE FUNERAL YOU WANT, NOT THE ONE YOU CAN AFFORD
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FUNERAL GUIDE
GOT A FUNERAL TO ORGANIZE AND DON’T KNOW WHERE TO START?
DON'T CALL ANY FUNERAL HOMES !! Let an 18 year industry veteran show
you the simple and effective steps that you NEED TO TAKE to get the
funeral you want, NOT the one you can afford.
WHAT DO YOU NEED TO DO?
It’s a fair question. I mean most people only tend to organize a
funeral once. How can they expect to be expert in it?
The trouble is – if it’s a loved one’s funeral you’re
organizing you have PRESSURE COMING FROM ALL DIRECTIONS. There’s an
obvious time scale that you want to adhere to, but there’s also the
fact that YOU ARE GRIEVING and it’s the last thing you want to be
doing.
So what do you do? You ring up one of the local FUNERAL HOMES and
just tell then to sort it out.
WRONG!!!!
Very Wrong
Before you know it you’ll have a bill for $10,000 hanging around
your neck to add to the already considerable stress you find yourself
under.
Ideally, of course, the funeral would have been organized by the
departed many years in advance, all paid up and signed for. But even
then the bills can start to roll in:
_INDUSTRY DIRTY TRICK:- It is a very common practice to pick out
your casket or urn as part of the deal when paying for a preplanned
funeral. Fair enough, but what they don’t tell you is that after
you’ve pushed off this mortal coil your urn/casket will no longer be
available (“end of line, sir”) and a new one will have to be
chosen._
Now, you tell me: If your nearest and dearest has just kicked the
bucket and your given this news do you a). Choose the more expensive
one, or, b). Go Cheap.
They’ve been using this one for years in the funeral homes
business.
_Ah..Ha, did you get that last word_: BUSINESS
Do you think they stick bodies in the ground FOR FUN?
The funeral homes business in the US is a multi-BILLION dollar
industry. Run more and more by massive corporations taking the local
funeral homes under their banner, forming a greater choke hold on the
options and costs of a funeral to the American public.
It’s why I got out – I got fed up of lying through my teeth and
screwing every last penny out of every last grieving relative that
came through my corporate owned doors – _I was starting to fear for
my soul_
So what did I do? I wrote a book.
· A book that can be used by those pre-planning
their funerals or organizing a loved ones.
· A book that will show you all the options
available in the marketplace – from traditional burials to turning
your remains into a pencil
· A book that will guide you simply and effectively
to resources and methods that will at least HALF THE COST of any
funeral and give you a BETTER QUALITY funeral for it.
· A book that the corporate accountants at Funeral
Homes Inc. (can’t use real names – very expensive lawyers) have
already tried to stop me selling because they said I gained the
knowledge for the book _while working for them_. Like the sludge have
a kind of patent on my mind. PARASITES.
Sorry, bit of a rant there.
So what’s in the book?
Well those of you who signed up for the TOP TIP on my page are
already aware of the quality and financial value of my books contents.
HOW MUCH DID YOU SAVE?
And those that signed up for my CHECKLIST on the page are well aware
of the step-by-step, simple yet powerful resources within it.
But here’s a RUNDOWN OF THE CONTENTS so you get an idea of the
topics covered:
1. IT’S YOUR FUNERAL, SO WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT IT?
Getting Your Last Rites Dead Right
Zapping the men in black
Ashes to ashes
Digging deep for funeral costs
Insurance gives no assurances
Opting for DIY funerals
Breaking with tradition - UK style
Cook’s coffin kitchen
Breaking with tradition - US style
2. STRIPPING FOR THE DEAD AND OTHER FUNERAL TRADITIONS
Jewish funerals
Christian funerals
Islamic funerals
Hindu traditions
Sikh funerals
Buddhist funerals
Strippers dance for the dead
3. BIDDING A FOND FAREWELL TO YOUR LOVED ONES
Planning a funeral
A family affair
Optional extras
Losing the plot
Coughing up dead money
Diners dying for a meal
Burning desire for cremations
Living funerals
Pulling out the stops for organ donation
Growing evidence at the body farm
4. YOU ONLY GET ONE CHANCE TO MAKE A LAST IMPRESSION
Putting nails in to your own coffin
Flat pack funerals with mail order coffins
Wicked wickerwork
Creative coffins
Shrouded in mystery
Urning your last resting place
Lights out, camera, action
5. PLACES YOU WANT TO BE SEEN DEAD
Hot ways to dispose of ashes
Is it legal to just scatter ashes
Going out with a bang
Dust to dust
In for a deep end
Diamonds are forever
Stars in their eyes
Elemental, my dear Watson
Heart to art
Stuck in the birdhouse
The write stuff
Ice, ice baby
6. SO MUCH TO DO AND SO LITTLE TIME TO DO IT
Pros and Cons of Funeral Plans
Funeral plans
Life assurance
Savings plans
Taking financial advice
Funeral Cost Calculator
The Final Countdown
Personal information
- Funeral and medical expenses
- Dealing with personal affairs
- The big day
- Informing those that need to know
Coping With Grief
The Death Clock
Top 10 Funeral tunes
Top Web resources
Did I miss anything?
Now we know that it contains everything you need to plan, organize
and finance a funeral. All the options available, the pitfalls to
avoid. But I’m also happy to say that it was very well written
because I DIDN’T WRITE IT.
Now before you click the little ‘X’ in the top right let me
explain:- All the knowledge is mine, all the know-how, all the tips.
But I couldn’t write graffiti.
That’s why I’m very happy to say the book was put together by
Steve Sims, a bona fide “For Dummies” writer, author of
‘Understanding and Paying Less Property Tax For Dummies’ –
-so he knows a thing or two about simple step-by-step instructions.
OK?
So,
* My book is so comprehensive it wipes the floor with every other
whimsical book out there written by well intentioned, BUT ULTIMATELY
CLUELESS, emotional types who thought they could help by comforting
you and maybe _give a few tips_. Ahbless.
NO GOOD TO YOU WHEN YOU’VE JUST BEEN SCREWED FOR $10,000 AND ALL
YOU CAN THINK ABOUT ARE THE CREDIT CARD BILLS AT THE GRAVESIDE, THE
GRAVESIDE THAT WAS YOUR SECOND CHOICE!
* It’s professionally written by an author that writes for
idiots. Well let’s face it, when it comes to funeral arranging
you’re a moron. I wouldn’t show you how to pull teeth, build a
wall or program software – so take it from me – you’re a moron.
* I can guarantee that even if you took a 1/10 of the knowledge in
this book and applied it you will save $1000’s. As easily as putting
it in your pocket.
* I also promise you that if you follow this book to organize your
own future funeral you’ll be taking a HUGE BURDEN off friends and
family. Please don’t put them through that, I saw 18 years of it and
it just isn’t worth it. Even if you just pre-plan a $500 funeral
it’ll be worth 100 times that to those you leave behind.
.
"OK SCOTT - SO WHAT'S THE COST FOR
THIS INCREDIBLE RESOURCE?"
.
Well if we're talking cost let’s look at a few figures for those
that haven’t signed up to the TOP TIP on the page-
If the average traditional funeral costs $6000 dollars and the
largest chunk of that cost is the casket, say $2000-$3000, how much is
it worth if you were told that the mark-up on a casket is over
_400%!!_ How much is it worth if you're told where you can buy it at a
wholesale price and cut out the middle man saving _$1500-$2250!!_
HOW MUCH DO YOU THINK YOU CAN SAVE BY BEING PREPARED, BY BEING WELL
INFORMED, BY BEING KNOWLEDGEABLE OF THE INDUSTRY? HOW BULLETPROOF DO
YOU THINK YOU CAN MAKE YOUR FUNERAL PLANS BY HAVING AN 18 YEAR FUNERAL
VETERAN BY YOUR SIDE WHILE YOU ORGANIZE IT? HOW MUCH?
Well even the little tip above will SAVE YOU $1000'S, how much would
you pay for that? $500? $200? What about $100? Of course you would!
But that's still a fair amount, and we’re only talking about a
book.
I WANT YOU TO BUY THIS AND GET THE FUNERAL THAT YOU AND YOUR LOVED
ONES DESERVE (and to stick it to the accountants at Funeral Inc). So
how about $47, no, $37?
$37 to save you and yours $1000's
$37 for the guide to your perfect funeral!
$37 for you and your loved ones peace of mind
$37 to screw Funeral Homes Inc. for $1000’s (YEH!!)
Not only is there a massive and obvious financial benefit but before
you've paid for the funeral this resource makes sure it’s DONE RIGHT
and the final farewell is the one that you AND your family want.
Now, at this point you know that this is something you should buy.
It’s a no-brainer.
However, this is the internet and of course all things on the
internet are _evil_, so-
I will give you a cast iron, 60 DAY GUARANTEE on the purchase of
‘The Complete Guide To Funerals’. If for ANY reason you decide you
want your money back you can have it. All I ask is that you send me a
brief letting me know your reason so I can better serve my readers in
the future.
That’s it! I’ve taken all the risk out of buying a resource that
_I KNOW_ will save you $1000’s and will give you a perfect funeral,
simply and efficiently, to the relief of you and any loved ones.
OH! AND ONE MORE THING
Just to show that I’m not urging you into an early grave to prove
my point and establish the brilliance of my book I’ve added a little
ironic bonus
IRONIC FREE BONUS: "INSIDER TIPS TO HEALTHY LIVING"
Just because our digital book is a guide to organizing and choosing
your or a loved ones funeral, it doesn't mean you have to be in a
rush.
This is the best all round book I've found for tips and advice on
healthy living and extending the time before your fantastic funeral.
So, to recap:
* You get a book that will instantly save you $1000's on any
funeral and show you how to do it correctly, to get the funeral you
want -
* A free bonus guide to healthy living. _AND_
* A 'no quibble' _60 DAY_ guarantee for the lot!!
ORDER NOW!
Digital eBook Version of "The Complete Guide To Funerals" ">5
MINUTES FROM NOW!_
JUST $37!!
It doesn't matter if it's 2 o'clock in the morning,
your ebook will be delivered to you 5 minutes after your order
_100% SECURE ORDERING SYSTEM_
Sincerely,
SCOTT GILLIGAN
P.S. Remember, "The Complete Guide To Funerals" will give you the
knowledge to reflect your life in your final farewell. Don't just let
it happen, be proactive and ensure that you and your loved ones are
financially prepared and organised. .
P.S.S. Don't forget that even if your not satisfied with this guide
(not going to happen) you have 60 days to get a full refund, and all I
ask is for a brief with a reason so I can better serve my readers.
P.S.S.S. One last thing. It may sound cheesy, but it's true: this
guide can truly make a huge positive impact on your life..deathboth!
Don't put this off a day. I know it's easy just to stick this site in
your website bookmarks folder, but if you're like me, and almost never
go back to your bookmarks, you'll lose out on this extremely valuable
resource, and never even realize it! - you'll be able to read the
eBook and the bonus 5 minutes from now!
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WELCOME
BuryOrBurn is all about the options, costs and planning of the
funeral you want not the one you can afford. The blog is full of info
and rants against the multi-billion dollar industry and our and pages
have top tips that will save you $1000's and ensure that any funeral
goes smoothly.
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business as it is. This has really shaken me and I will get on and do
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Ashley Burn
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shame, I was leaving my demise in the hands of my family. I won't be
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David Mesher
"an elegant, modern parable from the book of Scott, which should
become part of a new Funeral Bible."
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Whenever I read, there's always an aha! moment."
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